Yet more things that never made sense in Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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To mark its shock removal from Netflix UK (damn you!), here’s 20 more things that never made sense in Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

  1. Why didn’t The Master’s bones turn to dust like every other vamp that took a stake to the chest?
  2. Why did Angel start wearing that weird beige coat in season 2? Was that his ‘I have a soul’ coat?
  3. Why did The Anointed One look like so much like Billy the coma kid? V confusing.
  4. Why when Angel went on the cargo boat with the Judges’ arm did he jump in the water to save Buffy? Can Buffy not swim? Seems like a slayer should be able to swim.
  5. Speaking of – for all of Buffy’s super senses, why did she never wake up when bad shit crawled across her face at night? (I’m talking that weird egg and Bad Angel with his creepy cheek-stroking).
  6. How come the cops ‘dropped charges’ against Buffy for Kendra’s murder?
  7. Why did we never see Joyce’s ‘art gallery’?
  8. I know it was convenient for locking up werewolves and the like, but why was there a cage in the library anyway?
  9. Why was Willow’s dad always ‘out of town’?  And how come her ‘super strict’ parents never said anything about her passing up Oxford for Sunnydale University?
  10. Given that she didn’t go to school or have a job, what did Faith do when she wasn’t slaying? And what did ‘five by five’ even mean!
  11. How come you can take photos of a vampire but you can’t see their reflection?
  12. How did all the demons know martial arts?
  13. Where did Giles’ random British girlfriend disappear to?
  14. Who were all those people at Tara’s birthday party!?
  15. What happened to Willow and Tara’s cat?
  16. When Giles left Willow quipped: ‘What will he do in England? He never talks about anyone from there’. A good question Red. A good question.
  17. Did Willow and Tara ever graduate?
  18. Didn’t anyone think it was a bit weird that Giles wasn’t at Xander and Anya’s (non) wedding?
  19. What happened to the temple Dark Willow raised? Did it go back in the ground? Or did the residents of Sunnydale just go, ‘oh, that old thing…’
  20. Seriously though.. when did Xander have time to be ‘in the army’?

… and if that weren’t enough questions to be going on with, here’s a few more.

20 Things That Never Made Sense in Buffy the Vampire Slayer 

Kids in the mid-1990s fell into two camps when it came to Buffy the Vampire Slayer – those who fancied the pants off Sarah Michelle Geller and those who wanted to be like her.

That show was pretty much the reason for the popularity of crucifix chokers, chunky shoes and velvet dresses among teenage girls (oh who am I kidding, I still rock velvet), but dodgy fashion choices aside, those who loved the teen drama the first time around still enjoy watching it now.

My friend Emily and I have both been wasting hours of our lives revisiting the show on Netflix in recent months and two things have stood out for us – it’s way darker than either of us remembered and there are a hell of a lot of plot-holes that never dawned on us when we were wrapped up in the Buffy-Angel-Spike love triangle.

Here’s a few of them.

1.How did Joyce’s house get repaired every time it was destroyed? That place got trashed about a thousand times and no-one ever picked up a paint brush apart from that one time Xander boarded up a window when he ‘became a carpenter’. 

2.Ditto the Magic Shop.

3. Come to think of it, how did Buffy afford to keep that house after Joyce died when the only money she earned was from flipping burgers at the Double Meat Palace?

4. Why did the Scooby Gang always run everywhere and no-one ever had a car except Giles’ clapped-out banger?

5. How did Buffy acquire such an extensive wardrobe? The girl never had any money or went to the mall yet had a different coat for every kill.

6. Why on earth did anyone think Buffy would be a good guidance counsellor? Not exactly without her own issues was she? 

7. How come nobody questioned why Buffy was alive even though she had a burial and a headstone in the cemetery?

8. Why did everyone in Sunnydale seem oblivious to the fact that weird shit went down every single day? 

9. In fact, the only people outside the Scooby Gang that acknowledged the ever-present evil was the Initiative, who Buffy only ever seemed to bump into once by accident despite patrolling nightly.

10. Why were the previous slayers Spike killed fannying around in New York and wherever and not getting their asses to the Hellmouth like Kendra and Faith did?

11. Why was the Watchers Council in England? And why were there so many watchers when there was only supposed to be one slayer at a time?

12. Why did the Big Bads all wait patiently in turn to destroy the world on an annual basis?

13. Same goes for the fight scenes  – why did all the evil nasties queue up for a beating? 

14. Setting aside for a moment the fact it was a useful plot line – why didn’t B just jack in the slaying gig when Faith turned up?

15. On a related note, why wasn’t another slayer born after Buffy died in season 5? Was it because Faith was still technically a slayer even though she wasn’t around? Or did slayer production stop after an heir and a spare?

16. How come when Spike tried to have his wicked way with Buffy in that bathroom scene she didn’t just kick his ass like she did the other 1,256 times?

17. Dawn. So many questions it’s too hard to narrow down. You pick. 

18. How come Willow et al didn’t carry more weapons on their person? You’d think they’d all at least carry a stake yet were woefully unprepared at almost every turn. 

19. Speaking of which, when vampires got dusted why did their clothes disappear too? Surely they should have ended up in a little pile on the floor?

20. How come Buffy NEVER carried a bag unless it was a big holdall full of weapons. Where did she keep her keys, her money, her extensive collection of frosted lipgloss?!